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Smokers and Non-Smokers:
Another Reason Why I Hate Everyone

OMG SMORKING!!!

Smokers piss me off to no ends. I'm not talking about the people at the bar that have the occasional cigarette to supplement their alcohol intake, I'm referring to the bastards that sit in front of the mall and chain smoke to give off the air of coolness. Yes, you're so fucking cool when you exhale near a stroller. Oh yeah, you're even cooler to those 16 year old girls who offer fellatory services in trade for a menthol. Great way to get laid or make a quick buck, buddy.

To you ladies that smoke; that's just fucking disgusting. Females, smoking does not make you look more elegant. The only thing you're proving is that you know how to suck something down in five minutes or less. Don't you women know that men understand the easiest chick to lay is a smoker? Great image right there, seriously.

For all you damn, self-righteous, non-smokers: Get the fuck out of the smokers face. Do you really believe that the propaganda garbage you spew to them is really going to get them to change their ways? I don't give a fuck if you got your "facts" off of truth.com, every single one of you truly believe that some stranger coming up to a smoker is really going to change their habit. It's a fucking addiction, you dumb fucks. Even funnier, to me, than seeing some stuck up piece of shit that gets off on telling people how to live their lives is the fat ass that's getting pissed off because they want to eat their super sized meal (with a diet coke) without smelling cigarette smoke. Are you fucking kidding me?

From now on, I'm going to start heckling fat people in line at McDonalds. Just like smokers, I don't want to see them in public (although the laws that ban smoking are bullshit; quit telling everyone how to live their damn lives). If your fat ass requires two chairs to sit down, you're banned. You are just making it more difficult for people like me to find a damn chair in a crowded mall when all I want to do is eat my big ass slice of Sbarro pizza.

I'm also a big fan of this mentality, "I've been doing tequilla shooters since ten and I'm trying to have unprotected sex with this bitch I just met, so could you please put that cigarette out, the smoke is bothering her."

Now, on to all you in-between people: Social Smokers and Non-Heckling Non-Smokers. Pick a side you Swiss fucks.

I'm out.