Written by Morbid Optimist | 05 August 2009

You’re having a conversation with a friend while coming out of the supermarket, not being particularly loud, and you ask your buddy a question, “Did you see what type of soda we got?”

“No, what was it?”

“It’s in the cart, dumb-ass.”

“I don’t see it.”

This may not be the most intellectual conversation going on but, from out of nowhere, you hear a nasal voice chime in, “Can’t you see it’s Mountain Dew?”

You jerk your head in the direction of the unwanted comment only to get an eyeful of the beast that spoke it. Now, to be civil, you and your friend give her that little smile and nod, and you say to your friend as you suggest towards the woman, “Yeah, we got Mountain Dew.”

Or the situation where, while out to dinner, you tell your girlfriend (or boyfriend/spouse, whatever you’re in to) that you’re not quite sure what you feel like eating and this wildebeest snaps two legs on her chair just to lean over and tell you that the baked beans are “to die for.”

Well, dear readers, I have a query for you; if you could, please tell me why it is always an overweight woman who:

• Interrupts your conversation
• Is being overly loud
• Answers questions not posed to them
• Talks far longer than necessary

My assumption for this is that they are in dire need of positive attention and reinforcement that their existence isn’t completely unnecessary.

This time, though, I want to hear from the readers. Submit your thoughts on this subject to the comments below, I really look forward to hearing what you guys think.

With love and respect, as always,

Morbid Optimist